LOL, INACTIVITY

Sheesh, so much for frequent updates. Hopefully the quantity of sheer garbage I stuff up your happy holes tonight will make up for my last update being mid-November.

Let's see what I've got piled up, starting with the usual Exponent shitfuckery!

Article that concerned a festive marching band. Never ran, but I'm pretty sure I still got paid so it's all good!

For the last Tailgate Guide of the season, concerning the longstanding rivalry between IU and Perdoo and their battle for the Old Oaken Bucket. Shit, guys, it's just a bucket, simmer down.

(We lost, by the way)

Pete dunkin' a basketball. Pass the beer nuts.

Some decorative yuletide poop for an Entertainment Guide. Deadline nipping at my heels completely fucked Santa's right hand because I can't perspective very well when under pressure.

Now that that's over with, time for more of my typical, rarely-finished shit!

Good old Curly and Quote. Cave Story came up for whatever reason while I was nerding out with a handful of pals over Skype, and this abomination was the result. Quote's lookin' an awful lot like Chuck Balls minus the turkey...

I know he's supposed to talk backwards, but I never found the Vagineer vids that funny. However, the concept still slays me.

Great googly moogly, what could this be? You will soon find out.

Lastly, as inspired by Dino Max's recent slough of oooooold comic goodness, I decided to dig up this old yarn I cobbled together one slow New Year's back in high school. While normally I'm quick to toss my old crap out within five or six months of making it, there are a few lines in this that still make me chuckle. Perhaps I'll do another this year? We'll see. It'd be a nice juxtaposition of my character roster in 200X and my contemporary. You might recognize a handful of these bastards (though all have since been altered significantly over the years), but a good amount of them have since been abandoned for one reason or another.

The barrel of salt Dick refers to comes from a really old gag I did way back when with a character I've long since abandoned...

That's all for tonight, folks!

EXPONENT: PETE VS BADGER^2

First badgers, now a ferocious step up. This was for a Tailgate Guide highlighting Purdue versus the Michigan Wolverines.

And that's all I can squeeze out for now, I've got lots more shit to do.

'Till next time, my awesome audience of four or five!

EXPONENT: OF BADGERS AND PIXAR

Boy, have I been busy with the Exponent lately.

Tailgate Guide featuring Purdue VS Wisconsin and their badgers.

 Buzz here and the following are for an article covering Bob Peterson, one of the big cheeses at Pixar, who is an awesome guy and also a Purdue graduate that worked for the Exponent, to boot!

 Dug.

 

Mr. Ray.

 

And the everyman, himself.

That's all for tonight, folks!

A PRELUDE

Oh, mother fuck, ladies and gentlemen. I've been retarded busy composing some serious Exponent graphics the past couple days, and will be up until the wee hours of this morning. So I made something stupid out of components of the upcoming Tailgate Guide. (Click it, it moves! Shit!)

Yes, it's an homage to that. Pass the beer nuts.

I'll be back again soon to dump more colored shit.

Max out!

LOOKS LIKE IT'S TIME TO OIL UP

Been a while since the last post, huh? Let's have another update, some old things, some new! Shit!

A little bit of oil never hurt nobody.

Some time ago I was challenged by a friend to draw the human equivalent to his cat, Booboo; A sorry sack of lard that always looked like he was on the verge of tears, couldn't meow properly, and pissed at the drop of a hat.

SWING YOUR ARMS, FROM SIDE TO SIDE!

God rest your soul, Captain Lou Albano.

A lil' vignette elaborating on my two most boring characters, Niel and Colleen. My sense of humor is just as highbrow as ever.

Speaking of comics, I've started whipping up some buffer strips for my eventual premier spring semester. Here's the first.

And the second. Old followers might recognize the joke here, it's one of my oldies, distilled into a mere four panels. Lost a bit of fun, but it's all for the greater good.

This was originally just a practice sketch of Niel, but I snuck his wife in at the last second because the page looked empty... And pregnant women happen to be quite good at taking up room. The afterthought kinda completely fucked the sense of space but it still turned out cute enough not to incinerate.

For a short while after its release I was ass-deep in Blazblue, having sold my copy of Street Fighter IV to buy a Sega Saturn and it being the only 360 game I had for a few months. I've come to hate it now, but this still makes me laugh every time I see it kicking around in the oldies folder.

But I'd better stop before I run out of things to throw at you during another one of my dry spells.

Max out!

BASTARD ROLL CALL: CECILIA HSU

Time for an update in the dead of the night, motherfuckers! Tonight's intro is for my newest character, Sissy, whose design immediately reached the plateau of stupidity the first time I ever drew her. That's... A good sign, right?

Circa: 2010
Age: 24
Height: 7'6"
Weight: 144 pounds
Occupation: Scout

Sissy is an alcoholic ninja, and protects a plantation from deadly, highly contaminant zombie shit. But that's a story you'll hear about later.

She grew up with doting Chinese immigrant parents, and was pushed to going Ivy League for mathematics, but instead she sought the life of a vagabond, because she saw Charlie Chaplin pull it off successfully. Sissy ran away from home in Arizona meandered to Mexico. It was there she met her first true friend, Peñor, who was shortly killed in front of her own eyes in a tragic pinata accident. Taking his sombrero, the traumatized vagrant took to the bottle and made a years-long, drunken pilgrimage to the Great Plains, where she found a farm owned by a rich German lunatic. Otto took her in and sheltered her in exchange for cold-blooded zombie murder, and thus, Sissy found her niche in life, killing zombies by day, and sneaking into Otto's mansion by night to drink all his wine and sex his butler.

There's a lot more to her than that, but I don't want to spoil any more fun stuff as the comic she stars in is currently being scripted.

Theme song

EXPONENT: STOGIES AND CHIHUAHUAS

Another week, another graphic. I can't be arsed to explain, just enjoy the juxtaposition. And no, I don't know where the other half of that chihuahua is. Gruesome.

As an added bonus, a certain Other Max's mysterious dreamlady. Thought she might be fun to eke out in five minutes.

Max out!